CHOSEN...

One year ago today we got the call that we did not think would ever come. The call that said that we would get to be parents, finally.

The Gift We Could Not Give Each Other

When I was a little girl I held my dolls like children
Dreaming of the day when I'd have babies of my own
When the news was shared with me
That all those dreams could never be
It became the deepest grief my heart had ever known
There's a man who tried his best to comfort me with roses
Promising he'd find a way to make those dreams come true
He did everything he could
To heal my heart but nothing would
And when it seemed that we'd done everything that faith could do
A wondrous gift was given with a phone call straight from heaven
"There's a child that's nearly due that a young girl's giving you"
She gave more than just one life when she made of this man and wife
A father and a mother when she gave the gift
We could not give each other
More than words can ever say
Our hearts give thanks to heaven
Every time we hold this child we feel we hold the world
Words will never be enough to share the way our family feels
But with every breath we breathe we want to tell that girl
Not a day is ever through
Till we thank the Lord for you
And sweetness lingers here
In our thoughts and prayers
You gave more than just one life
When you made this man and wife a father and a mother
And you gave the gift we could not give each other
You have changed our lives forever
Only you and God above could give the gift of love
we could not give each other
A song from the Book "From Gods Arms To my Arms To Yours" by Michael McLean

My cell phone rang on Tuesday, July 24th, 2007, and I did not recognize the phone number so I didn't answer it. After a minute my phone made a little noise telling me they had left a message. It was our social worker, Cary. He said that he would track down Hubs at work. I got a little antsy thinking maybe this was the call we had hoped for, but I wasn't jumping to too many conclusions, I didn't want to get my hopes up. A few minutes later Hubs calls me from work, and said that Cary had called him and told him that we had been chosen by a Birthmother. He gave us her name, age and phone number and told us when the baby was due. He told us to call her and it was up to us how we went forward with the Birthmother and that he didn't really need to be involved. I was kind of in shock, I didn't cry or get hysterical, I just said, OK. I guess this is it.

I waited until Thursday evening to call C. I was a bit terrified, since I really hate talking on the phone. So Hubs and I kneeled down together to pray for the strength we needed to do this. I gave her a call and we talked for about a half hour or so. One thing I remember very clearly her asking us was, "So are you excited?" I couldn't believe that she was so sweet to ask us that. She told me that she was going to find out the next day if the baby was a boy or girl and she was going to have the ultrasound recorded on a video tape for us. She said that she thought that the baby would have brown curly hair and brown eyes (so we have been quite surprised by his red hair and bright blue eyes, which we love). We tried to come up with a good weekend we could get together with her since she only lived an hour away. It wouldn't be for weeks that we would all be able to do this and I was a bit disappointed because I was so anxious to meet her. C called me the next afternoon to tell me that it was a BOY. I was so excited! Except that Hubs and I could not ever agree on boy names, ever.

I called my mom and dad that afternoon. My parents had already planned on coming for Christmas, so I had asked my mom if they were still planning on coming for Christmas, she said yes. So I told her I just got her the best Christmas present and I asked her if she wanted to know what it was. She said yes, so I said "a baby boy". She was a little confused. So I then told her that we were going to adopt a baby boy due in December. She started to cry.

Hubs's parents were coming the next day to visit for a few days. So we decided to wait and tell them when they got there. When they got there Hubs waited till he was ready and told them that they would have another grandson coming in December. They were confused too, and we had to explain that we were CHOSEN by a birthmother to adopt her baby boy. Hubs's Mom was in tears.

I have been wanting to share the comment C left me on Mother's Day (from the blog that I keep for her). I felt like this was the perfect time...

Yay! I'm so glad i got to see you guys! you are the best B! i love you the most! you are definitely one of the best moms i know! I hope you have had a good first mothers day! I have to tell you that I'm so glad that you're Mac's mom. I've been hearing a lot of talks about prayers lately and thinking back, i remember when i first was looking at profiles of couples who wanted to adopt, and as soon as i saw your guys profile, i felt like you were the couple for him. for a couple weeks i had tried praying about it and hadn't seemed to get an answer, and one morning i got on my knees and said "father, i really would like B and B to be peanuts parents" and i just got this woosh of peace and calming and i knew that you were meant to be his parents from the beginning. I don't know why i just told you that story, but i guess I'm just so thankful that Heavenly father had a plan for all four of us before we even knew it. Seeing you with Mac just reaffirms every time that I made be the best choice by giving him to you and you made the wonderful decision to accept him :) I am so excited that you get to move back to be close to your family, seriously that's what i really wanted for Mac was for him to be able to be close to his cousins and grandparents and aunts and uncles. I love you so much! You are so amazing :) Thank you for everything you've done for me...thank you isn't enough! :)Love,C

Yep that's our beautiful, amazing C!

I can't even begin to tell you how I feel when I think about how all of this came to pass, and to finally have our sweet little Mac in our arms. And also the relationship we have with C and the feelings we have for her are just indescribable!

We love you C, more than you can even imagine!

Thank You for what you have done for us, for yourself, and especially for our Mac!

And you are right, Thank You just isn't quite enough!