Mac and Oak funnies...

So for some reason I forgot about recording these on here! But here are all the funny things my kids have said over the last year. The top is the most recent and bottom is from a year ago.

3.5 hours into a 4.5 hour drive. 
Mac: Can we play the quiet game?
Me: Well...ok I guess so. 
Kids: Yay!!!
Parenting win!
Oak 4 / Mac 1

We were playing a game and Oak's turn did not go so well and then she says, "This is not how Batman dies!" I have never heard her quote this before, but knew it was from the Lego movie. So funny!

Mac as he was trying to get me and grandma out the door: "m-o-m and old m-o-m let's go!"

A conversation with Oaklee about arguing after talking to my mom: 
Oak: you are not supposed to argue. Moms and daughters don't argue. 
Me: but you argue with me. 
Oak: but if the mom is also a grandma then you can't argue. 
Me: oh got it.
Oak: you always break the law.
Me: no I don't. If I did I would be in jail.
Oak: well the rule is no arguing and you TEND to do that.

Oaklee climbed into my bed one morning. A few minutes later...
Oak: I can't go back to sleep because of the air. 
Me: the air? What's wrong with the air?
Oak: it's too loud.

A Mac random: "Mom I think that I would never want to play video games or play on the computer ever again if we lived in the forest, by a river, in a tent so that I could just fish all day with Dad." Oh that would be the life bud!

Oaklee noticed the bag of chocolate on my nightstand. 
Oak: What are these for?
Me: Daddy knew that I had a rough day yesterday and he knows that I love chocolate so to be nice he got me those.
Oak: So now I can tell my husband what to buy me when I have a rough day.
heart emoticon

Mac was quizzing us. Mac: "What is the name of the magician that is death?" Translation: What is the name of the musician that is deaf? Lol, cute!

Me: I'm going to lose my mind.
Oak: And pull your hair out?
Me: Pretty much.

Mac about to eat his 6th "little cutie" says, "Mom, I'm about to break the world record for how many cuties a six year old can eat. 

Oak to daddy: "Dad I need you to do me a favor...I need you to play the piano wihle I play the guitar."

Mac comes into my bed and starts playing a little play guitar, "This is a song about a boy being friends with a zombie." No words, just music, with an occasional interpretation of "This is the part where..."

Oak funny: she got some new fingerless gloves as a gift. "I never thought I would get gloves like these...then BAM!! I got some!"

Oak to Mac: "Isn't it cool I can do talented things?...Shake your head yes. "

Oak funny: the kids were talking about how they were going to take the train with grandma and grandpa back to their house. And Oak says, "yeah dad, maybe we will send you a card!"

Oak quote as we walked into the craft store: "I think they saw my beautifulness so they turned this music on."

Mac and Daddy went golfing.
Mac: Is golfing a sport?
Dad: yep
Mac: Dad, I think I found my sport.

Oaklee: I want to be a princess for Halloween.
Me: Do you want to be Elsa? You already have an Elsa dress you could wear.
Oak: Yeah! But could you KNIT me ice powers?
Me: What?! How am I supposed to knit you ice powers?
Oak: Actually I'll just be a ghost.

I told the kids to go clean up their mess before they made a new one. 
Overheard this conversation while on their way to clean up...
Oak: Let's go play!
Mac: We need to clean up then we can play.
Oak: Let's clean and play...you clean and I'll play!


Oak 6:50 am, dressed as Spider-Man ...
Me: you are so cute. 
Oak: Spider-Man is not cute!...well he was when he was a baby.

My kids were upstairs cleaning their rooms. All of a sudden I hear Mac yell down to me that "Oak is coming downstairs to tell you how much she loves me and thinks I am the best big brother ever!" Then I hear Oak stomping down the stairs and she yells, "NO I'M NOT! Mac threw something at me and hurt me". 

Oak prayed one morning that "everyone will listen to their moms." 

Checking out at Home Depot...
Mac: I scanned my hand!
Me: how much are you worth?
Mac: your love (then gives me a big hug)
I needed to hear that after a rough day with him yesterday.

Mac quote (mad at me for receiving a consequence for a poor choice): "you sure know how to make a boy sad!"

Text from my mom: "Oak just said to me...I WISH MY MOM WAS HERE...SHE CAN DO ANYTHING." Totally made my day!

Oak asked grandma to draw a unicorn.
Oak: that's not a unicorn!
Mac: she's doing the best she can!

My kids five minutes before dinner: "I'm starving! Can I have a snack?"
(No snack given) 
My kids at dinner after zero bites of food eaten: "I'm too full to eat!"

Mac and Oak were playing. Mac: "You scared the wits out of me! THE WITS ARE SCARED!"

Oak funny: Oak was brushing my hair and she was looking at all my gray hair and says, "You have frozen in your hair!" Yes, yes I do!

Oak funny: I did her hair this morning and asked if she liked it. She looked in the mirror and said she did. So ten hours later she was playing with her hair then all of a sudden she starts glaring at me and I could tell she was mad. I asked what was wrong and she says, "You didn't do my hair the way I wanted!" Lol

Mac and Oak were playing the piano. 
Oak: "McCoy you be the grinch and play over there."(Pointing to the other end of the piano). 
Mac: (starts playing on Oaks end)
Oak: "No, your the grinch and play over there." 
Mac: "Well the grinch does go down into your town." 
He's got a point! His logic lately kills me!

Thank you Frozen for the cute moment in the craft store today where I listened to my daughter belt out "Let it go!" at the top of her lungs, and for the numerous times a day where she also tells me she doesn't need to wear her coat because, "The cold doesn't bother me anyway!" 

Last night we were looking through a brand new house an acquaintance built. When I was snuggling with Mac at bedtime he says very seriously, "Mom, I want to talk to you about something...you know that house that we looked at?...If we buy that house, I am worried about buying ice cream and it melting because there wasn't a freezer." Oh to be six and be worried about something like that.

funnies

Mac thinks that adding the lines to the letters in his name means that he is writing it in Chinese.

Oak funny: Oaklee was not listening and daddy was counting to give her incentive to listen. 
Daddy: what happens when I get to three?
Oak: four!

Me: Your new shoes are awesome.
Mac: Well that is what I always try to be!

Oak held up her quarter and asked her brother, "Is this an eagle?" Brother nods his head. Then Oak says, "Oh, I thought it was a peregrine falcon." What?! I didn't even know she knew what that was. My kids never cease to amaze me!

Oak funny: (this is a generalization, since I wasn't there) Oak was mad at grandpa about something...
Oak: you're not my grandpa!
Grandpa: I will always be your grandpa.
Oak: my dad can fix that!

Me: Oak, I am so lucky to be your Mama.
Oak: Ya, and I am so lucky to be your girl.  

McCoy: "When I grow up and get married, I want to stay home and take care of the kids while my wife goes to work." 
Mom: "Um...okay."

Oaklee has a chronic plumbers crack problem. This morning as she was climbing into her car seat it was in full force so I was fixing it. Then Oak says to me in the most annoyed voice, "Mom, can you just leave my bum alone!" Oh my goodness I love her, plumbers crack and all!

Oak out of the blue...
Oak: Why do dogs have tails?
Me: I don't know, but I don't think all dogs have tails.
Oak: Snowmen don't have tails!

We were in Toys R Us returning something, and as we were walking around the store, I think more as a reminder to himself Mac says, "I DISTINCTLY remember you telling us we couldn't buy anything."

Oak sillies:
--Instead of saying "special delivery" she says "spankdelivery".
--She calls our iTouch "The iPatch". I am thinking a cross between iTouch and iPad.
--No matter how many times I correct her she calls a car seat a "seat-car".

On our way to Taekwondo (so he was wearing his uniform) I had Mac run into the library to return a DVD. He comes out with the biggest grin on his face and says, "Mom, everyone was looking at me and they were thinking "wow he is so cool, I better not mess with him.""

Mac: Can I have a snack?
Me: Sure, would you like some pineapple?
Mac: Yes. When I am done with my pineapple can I have something else?
Me: Sure, like what?
Mac: Like something that ISN'T healthy for me?

funnies and sweeties

Mac was upset at Oak because he wanted to hold her ladybug, hence the face.

funnies:

Oak: Mac can we fight the bad guys? Cause they tickled my baby!

I told her that my stomach hurts...

Oak: Mom if your stomach hurts, you should go lay down.

Oak: I'm a great jumper!

Mom: You are! How did you get to be such a great jumper?

Oak: Because I'm beautiful.

Hubs had put on The Mormon Channel on our ROKU and pulled up the scripture reader for kids where it shows just pictures and narrates them. When breakfast was ready Mac asked if we could watch it during breakfast, I told him we couldn't and reminded him of our rule of no tv while eating meals (except on Friday and/or Saturday). He got really mad (lately he feels that rules don't apply to him anymore) and said, "I guess you don't want me to learn the Gospel!!" Kind of hard to argue with that :) Actually I still didn't let him because I explained to him why we don't watch tv while we are eating and that I really wanted to talk with him. He wasn't buying it.

The kids hate when hubs and I kiss. And one night when I was putting Mac to bed he told me I could kiss him and Oak all I wanted but I couldn't kiss dad, but could just give him high fives. He was dead serious!!

We were eating at my in-laws house and the missionaries were over for dinner also. Oak was really wanting to talk to the missionaries and for them to pay more attention to her. So she got there attention and said, "Elders, do you know what?...My mom....my mom is cute!"

Oak got a new pair of crocks since she has outgrown her old ones. Every time she would put them in the first couple of days having them she would say, "These aren't just any crocks...these are girl shoes."

Mac woke me up at a little after 6 am with "I need you mom, I have a special occasion for you." I was already awake and was thinking he was going to surprise me with something special since he has kind of been doing little sweet surprises for us lately, so I got up. I then found him in the bathroom where he announces he has diarrhea and he had an accident in his underwear. At first I was thinking that he still had a surprise for me, but after talking with him, I found out I was wrong and me helping him get cleaned up WAS the special occasion. Luckiest mama in the world, right here!!

We were playing outside and my kids were fighting over who got to hold Bobo's leash (our neighbor's dog). At one point Oak was holding the leash and Mac was pretending to be scared or something and ran away from Oak and Bobo. Oak then shouted to Mac, "It's just Bobo, not a monster". She said it in a tone of "are you blind?!?!"

Sweet Moments:

Hubs decided he wanted to give the kids "Father's blessings". Oak was very excited about it, and sat on the chair perfectly still, arms, folded, head bowed, and eyes closed for the whole blessing. Then she stood up and daddy went to give her a hug, and she stuck out her hand to shake daddy's hand instead. Then she just walked away with a big smile on her face. It was so precious and sweet!

Oak had asked me about where the trees came from. I explained to her that Heavenly Father made them, and mentioned a few other things that He also made. Then Mac walked up to Oak and said he wanted to tell her something. He put his hand on her shoulder and got really close to her and gently said, "Oak, Heavenly Father made YOU." Talk about tugging at my mommy heart strings.

One night after I had put Oak to bed (and daddy was at a church meeting), I asked Mac if he wanted to play a game before he went to bed. He chose a game, and I asked him if when we were done with that game if we could play Sequence Jr. (my favorite game). He said that was fine and when we were done with his game he went and got Go Fish instead. I reminded him that he said it was okay if we played Sequence, and that I really wanted to play Sequence. He got all pouty, and I decided to let it go (which I am trying to do more off) and told him that we could play Go Fish, and told him that it wasn't because he was pouting, but because I love him. And I meant that. He got kind of serious and then kind of mumbled to himself that he had a hard decision to make. And sat there for a bit, then got up, put the Go Fish game back and got the Sequence game out instead. I was a bit shocked and so proud of him for putting someone before himself and his wants. I talked to him about how proud I was of him, and how proud Heavenly Father was of him for making such a selfless choice. And I told him that I really was okay with playing Go Fish, if that is what he really wanted to play. 

Mac: "brownies, cookies, cakes and  muffins...I love you more than all of those things mommy!"

funnies

Mac: "I can be a book writer (illustrator). See, I figured out how to make it look like two ghosts are bumping into each other." Smarty pants!

Oak had said something cute...
Mommy: you are just so adorable!
Oak: just don't call me cute!

Oak has her special bear that she has to have to suck her thumb. She has to hold the ear of the bear with her thumb sucking hand while she sucks her thumb. We only let her have it in her bed for sleeping. When I went to get her out of bed one morning and I asked her if she wanted to get up. In talking about sucking her thumb with her bear, She says, " I have just a little more left, I need to get this one part." and then she went back to sucking her thumb.

Mac: I can't wait to have kids!
Me: really? How come?
Mac: because I can do fun things with them..... But there is one thing I don't want to talk about until I am seven or six.
Me: what is that?
Mac: getting married!

Oak has become Mac's second mom...After Mac burped at dinner one night, "Mac, no burping at the dinner table."...and then after Mac handed me something and I said thank you, "Mac you need to say you're welcome." She is quite the firecracker!

Mac explaining to Oak why she couldn't go on the bumper cars at the mall: "I am five, you are two...five is like five dollars and two is like two nickels...do you get it?...(oak doesn't say anything)...fine, I will explain it to you later!"

Mommy (to both Oak and Mac): When this show is over we are getting dressed.
Oak (to Mac): No crying or whining okay?

Mac was really upset one day because I wouldn't let him make and give out birthday invitations for his 6th birthday party in 11 months. Silly boy, love him!

Mac: Mom, I had a dream about what you and daddy do.
Mom: What would that be?
Mac: You were kissing...it was HORRIBLE!